


Bittersweet Dreams

by gala_apples



Category: X-Men (Movies)
Genre: BDSM, M/M, Other, Puppy Play, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-14
Updated: 2012-05-14
Packaged: 2017-11-05 09:44:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/405010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gala_apples/pseuds/gala_apples
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They're too different, too similar, to want each other. But they need each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bittersweet Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by the Tori Amos' lyrics "you can bring your dog, I got three." and "I'm not making any promises, I'm not living to be the missus, I'm not making any promises, but you've still got that something...pretty boy"

John checks over his email one last time. Everything is spelled properly, paragraphs are descriptive but not long enough to be tl; dr. He hovers his mouse over send, then decides to attach a postscript.

ps: you can bring your dogs. I have three.  
John.

He doesn't know if Bobby will actually visit. They've kept in contact through email and the occasional phone call, but it's been ten years since the last time they looked each other in the face. It was a mutual decision. Their lives, their personalities are simultaneously too different and too similar for them get along if they have to stand beside each other. Emails work much better because those can be ignored and left for a better time if need be. They don't even live close enough to hang out if they wanted to, John in San Francisco, and Bobby in New York.

But Bobby's coming to San Fran to pick up a hand crafted table from a famous artesian, and John's just offered him a room if he wants to stay a night. He tries to occupy himself by trolling the internet, and when that doesn't work calling his Dog into the room, but even that isn't enough. He ends up just staring at the screen, waiting for the box to pop up in the corner saying he has a new message.

Finally one comes. He clicks the email open, scrolls through the rest of the response to find Bobby's answer. According to the email, Bobby can stay overnight, but he has to take off before noon. That's perfectly acceptable in John's eyes. Enough time to rememorize his face, but not enough time that Bobby will start to get on his nerves.

The day Bobby is supposed to arrive at his house, he lines his dogs up at his feet. Wolf, Dog, Puppy, all three are beautiful and he's proud to own them. He startles at the doorbell, but stands to answer it. They follow at his feet, and John makes sure they're in the right position before he opens the door.

Although he had invited it, John's a bit surprised to see that Bobby's actually brought his dog with him. He's holding a duffle, and he looks remarkably like John did ten years ago. He's slim, shorter then Bobby, and has slicked back hair.

"Do you need anything?"

"We could both use a glass of water." Bobby suggests.

"Dog?" it comes out as a question, but his dogs know it's not. Dog moves from kneeling position to standing, then tucks his arms behind his back before he walks into the kitchen. He comes back with both his arms out, but John forgives him because he's got something in both hands.

"Do you want him to put your bag down? And what would you prefer I call him?"

"He's Alex, and if one of your dogs can show him where to put the bag, that would be wonderful."

John sends Wolf to show Alex where to put down their luggage, then retires to the living room. Bobby sits beside him and Dog sits cross-legged on the floor. Puppy knows he doesn't have the privilege, so he follows the yellow tape back into the bedroom. They watch a lame daytime sitcom before Bobby asks him the question John's been expecting since they broke up ten years ago.

"What are your rules? Especially since you have more than one. How do you manage? Sometimes I can barely handle Alex."

"Begging your pardon, that's not true sir." Bobby leans forward and tousles Alex's hair. A clear sign of forgiveness for arguing with Bobby, it reminds John he should let Puppy out of his room soon.

"I've a Wolf, a Dog, and sometimes a Puppy. I'm sure you've noticed the duct tape lining the hardwood."

"Pretty hard not to, it's green and yellow and red. Colourful, but probably not the best for resale value."

"Well, II'm not planning on moving any time soon. My Wolf is my favoured man. As you can see, he's wearing a green collar. The green runs throughout the house, meaning he can go wherever he wants, do what he wants, within reason. My Dog wears a red collar, and the red tape runs throughout the house as well, but he has to ask for permission. Sometimes I have two dogs, I'm happiest when I have two dogs. But sometimes one disobeys, and that's when he wears the Puppy collar. Baring extraordinary events, like you coming to the door, Puppy is only allowed in his bedroom, or the bathroom."

"That's an interesting system," Bobby offers. And that is precisely why they can't be friends that see each other often, they don't agree with each other's choices. John thinks that from what he's seen, Bobby's set of rules for Alex are weak, but he isn't going to say that. He has a feeling they'll both be dancing around each other until Bobby gets home and they can speak the truth in their emails. If they have less then twenty-four hours together, then it shouldn't be spent arguing.

John suggests to Wolf that he put on a channel they'll all like. Wolf crawls to the television and presses up-channel until he lands on home and garden. It's a good choice, John likes watching renovations, and Bobby obviously has an interest if he's flown out to San Francisco just for furniture. Wolf gets rewarded with a short but passionate kiss, a hand on his green collar pulling him closer to John. He sees Dog and Alex watching them, and wonders if Bobby is going to follow suit.

After Dog makes dinner- while he doesn't quirk the Rules for something so insignificant, John's happy that Phillip is Dog tonight because he's a chef in his other life- it occurs to John that Bobby and Alex might need some time to Play. 

"The spare bedroom is fairly soundproof. And there's this club, Innervision, if you like to take him out."

"Thanks, but no. I like my toys in my own bedroom, not being ogled by others." That John can understand, he doesn't like taking all three out at the same time either. It undermines his sense of control when others are hitting on his dogs, and he knows they find it uncomfortable too. When the dominant is out of control, it takes the security away from the submissives, that's a first day lesson.

It's nine, and they've been watching tv since Bobby arrived. John wants to offer something interesting, but he doesn't really do much. He works, comes home, and Plays with his dogs. He's only twenty-seven, and his life has already settled into a routine. He turns to Bobby to suggest they go out to the movie theatre, and Bobby turns to him and lunges forward. As a matter of reflex John wraps his arms around Bobby, holds him tightly against his body. Bobby's mouth is like kissing heaven, he's almost forgotten since the last time they were together.

It's when he pulls away an inch for breath that he realises they have an audience. Alex has spent the night silent and staring, probably on Bobby's orders, so that doesn't surprise him. But the audience holds three, actually, because Wolf and Dog are staring just as avidly as Bobby's Alex.

He's got responsibilities to his dogs, and Bobby has responsibilities towards Alex. They've taken on the role of powerful protector, and to do this would ruin their role. But even those in control need time off, and there's nothing that John wants more then to be sixteen and making out with Bobby in their shared room. 

If he asked 'could we', the answer would be yes. They are physically capable of retiring to John's bedroom, or even staying here. Bobby will touch him, he will touch Bobby, and they'll come and be happy.

If he asked 'should we', the answer would be no. How could Wolf or Dog or Puppy trust him as completely as they do now, if he cheated on them? More than that, why would the person under the persona put up with it? Phillip and Konrad and Dustin, why would any of them want to look at him again, let alone submit to his touch?

But Bobby doesn't give him a chance to ask anything, just shoves him down on the couch until he's awkwardly sprawled under the slightly larger man. And that's when John's sexual persona comes out too, and he struggles to get out from underneath Bobby. He's not the submissive one. Neither of them are, that's why they broke up so many years ago. It's impossible to hold a relationship with someone you can't have sexually please, no matter how much you love them.

John shoves at Bobby until he gets off him. They look at each other from the ends of the couch, sad smiles stretching across their faces. "This won't work." John tells him.

"I know. I just thought..."

"Yeah. Me too."

Because the truth is, as much as he's got a committed relationship to Phillip and Konrad and Dustin- you can't get more committed than hand feeding them when they've got their arms zipped into leather sheaths behind their backs- he'd give it up in a second for Bobby. If there was any way they could fuck and not fall apart at the seams, they would. But they just can't.

They only manage another half hour of mindless television before Bobby says he and Alex are going to bed. It hurts to hear, but it's better than them leaving and finding a hotel. John climbs the stairs to his bedroom, and pauses a moment to get Puppy from the second bedroom. He listens to their needs and whips or spanks or jerks off accordingly, because if you can provide someone what they need, you have a duty to. There are too many people going without to not help where you can.

He falls asleep surrounded by those that love him. Wolf is on his right, head on his chest slowly rising and falling with John's breath. Dog is on his left, on his stomach to give his back time to heal, hand up on John's shoulder. And Puppy is lying across the bottom of the bed, surely happy all four members of their family are short so that there's room for him.

He falls asleep with those he loves, but not with the one he needs. It guarantees for bittersweet dreams.


End file.
